I killed the 3am disk-space alert with 14 lines of bash

The pager went off at 3am for the same reason every week: /var filling up. So we automated the boring part — and left a very loud kill switch.

The problem

A small, annoying task that was eating time and attention every week. We measured it before touching anything.

The approach

One focused change, reproducible, with a guardrail and an obvious way to turn it off. No magic, no vibes.

$ ./run --dry-run
[ ok ] plan looks sane
$ ./run --apply

The receipts

Before/after benchmarks, the failure modes we hit, and the tradeoffs we accepted. The repo has the full runbook.